I suppose the first thing that made me think of doing a post on this topic happened during my choir lesson. I had never gotten a piece of music back from the student teacher, and he had us sing it today. I asked to share with a friend because I knew for a fact that he had lost it, it not being with the unclaimed music. She offered to ask him about it for me, but I turned her down, saying it wasn't a big deal, and I would memorise the music soon anyway. Though this definitely was a very minor incident, it made me think of human truths. It's nature, I realised, to take the easy way out and to, bluntly, be lazy; letting something slide rather than jumping on it and drawing attention to yourself. If I had asked for my music, the worst he could have told me would be to share with someone. To me, I think we all need to step it up, including myself, and take charge of a situation instead of thinking, 'I'll do it next time,'.
The second event was when I came home today, and both my parents began lecturing me about the numerous music and theatrical lessons I am taking, and about my seeming inability to want to practice. I retorted with the reply that I didn't like people listening to my singing or piano playing or monologue reading because family members were too judgemental. Looking back on the incident, I found that for myself, it's a matter of insecurity and fear of consequences, the reason I don't practice as often as I should. I'm afraid, 1, that those listening will hear my mistakes and criticise me deeply about them, 2, that I really am not talented and those listening will feel sorry for me, and 3, that if I don't practice enough, my parent will be angry, and if I practice too much, they'll be angry about the constant soundtrack coming from the living room. It opened to me another human truth: We become paranoid when we are devoted to something. We focus on what we think the outcomes will be, and the many possible mishapping, when in reality, we should be living and thinking in the present, and trusting that we're doing the right thing.
Finally, the third happenstance of the day was while I was playing piano. The song, which I suppose has some importance to this post, was Everything Else, from Next to Normal. I was simply sight reading it, trying to play the accompaniment. The lyrics of the song expose the joy one feels when one has an escape from the world. "Everything else goes away [when I play piano]" sings Natalie during the song. Reiterating from a previous post, theatre is what people go to as a distraction from their real-world problems. While there is great comfort, for anyone, at the theatre, or at the sports stadium, or at the cinema, whatever your personal distraction is, when the song finishes, or the crowd roars, or the credits pop up on the screen, it's over. You have to go back into the real world and deal with your problems. This opened to me a final truth, that even though ignorance is bliss, and it's easier to go with the crowd and try to block out what you don't like, there is a time that you will have to deal with it. You can't escape from everything.
I hope I haven't been too boring. How on earth did I manage to write my English essay as well as this essay-length post? The world will never know. Have a good life, all. Sorry if that sounded dismal, but we are talking about life, now, aren't we. xx
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